Song: I Been Working!

No Motherfucking in the Dairy

I just heard one of the most impressive standalone statements I have ever heard. It may actually guide me through the rest of my life. I stopped at the UDF on Winton Road on the way to a client meeting to get a bag of Grippos and a Coke. An older woman and a younger woman walked in right behind me. The younger woman was loudly detailing a conflict she had experienced with someone they both appeared to know, and was using a lot of profanity. The older woman interrupted her with the command: ‘Stop Motherfucking, we in The Dairy’. The younger girl immediately stopped swearing and lowered her voice. The reference to ‘The Dairy’, and the authority in her voice, almost seemed to sanctify UDF. It was impressive. And now I know: You do not Motherfuck in The Dairy. Under no circumstances.

Coffee with Portal

I pulled up my driveway after going to get coffee and decided to just sit there for a minute, listen to Portal, and center myself for the morning. It was still raining a little, and was dark and windy. I had parked next to a large bush that stands at the stairway to my deck, and watched it blowing around in the wind. Then I squinted and stretched my head forward. Was the bush moving closer to me? It was. Was the house moving closer to me? It was. I bordered on dizziness as the chaos in the music intensified, and the entire surface of the world seemed to slide off of its base towards me. Was reality unraveling? Then I realized when I pulled into the driveway I had forgotten to put the car in park, and I had just lifted my foot off the brake. Anyway, Portal is good if you’re into that type of music.

Song: Crime is Not a Crime