1. Thou Shalt Not eat at any restaurant that has a drive-thru.
2. Thous Shalt Not listen to talk radio, nor shalt thou buy gold.
3. Thou Shalt read at least one piece of literature per month by an author who died before your father was born.
4. Thou Shalt Not drink alone.
5. Thou Shalt express thy patriotism not through the medium of bumper stickers, but through volunteering your time.
6. Thou Shalt learn how to ride a unicycle.
7. Thou Shalt add as many words to thine vocabulary as there are months in the year.
8. Thou Shalt Not receive revealed wisdom, nor shalt thou bow to the dictates of any authority without submitting said dictates and/or wisdom to rigorous empirical inquiry.
9. Thou shalt eat more Greek food. It's delicious!
10. Thou Shalt modify this list of commandments as needed to better fit your life.