Saturday, February 16, 2013

Morning Inventory

I wake up this morning glad for breakfast and dinner (I often skip lunch)
Glad for waking up, glad for showers, glad for brushing my teeth.
I am glad for the sound of kids in the next room playing (because they usually get up before me)
Glad for the smell of coffee, even though I can't drink it because of my ulcers.

I wake up glad for my weekly therapy session. Glad for the morning lexapro and b12 supplement.
Glad for the 10 wimpy push-ups, glad for tying my tie on the week-day, and glad for my t-shirt
on the weekend. Glad for my pajamas, glad for the chihuahua on my lap, glad for the kiss from my wife. Glad for the every now and then fight.

I am glad that my job requires that I compose a monthly report. I am glad for each chewed fingernail, each shave, each papercut, each shit and piss, each valerian pill at bed time, each orgasm (alone or with a friend), and each song I sing (alone or with a friend). I am glad for valentine's day, Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and every birthday. I am glad every time I fill up the tank.

These irregular and regular landmarks are the things that make up my life, and each time I hit one of these landmarks brings me closer to the last one. Every time I hug my kids brings me closer to the last time I will hug my kids. Every time I pet my dog, make love to my wife, read a book, watch a movie, wash a dish, stand in a line...

I am glad for these events, because without them the scenery would never change, there would be no filters, and it would all be over much too goddamn fast.

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