Something will kill you,
You lovers of life.
If you seek pleasure in sex
You will die of aids,
If you seek pleasure in food,
You will die of diabetes.
Alcohol will give you cirrhosis,
Marijuana will make you depressed,
politics will make you conniving,
And religion will make you lonely.
Think too hard and you will go crazy,
Don’t think enough, and you’ll be hit by a bus.
Life is for the living,
But you can’t live long, because life will kill you.
So do something, nervous squirrels,
Just don’t do too much of it.