The Gentle Type

I'm so goddamned sensitive.
Everything's the crusades with me.
And I don't even drink anymore!
Some guy says something bad
About the president--
I don't even like the president--
You'd think he insulted my mother.
Another guy wants to go in on me
About the welfare state;
You'd think he insulted the president's mother!
It's always a war with me.
I crave it.
Love to feel the meat
Jammed between my teeth.
And Caine slew Abel
And Germany invaded Poland
And there I am in my basement
In my underwear on the computer
Baiting the Internet trolls
Making them wish they had mothers
To cry to.